Rob and Kristen- Under the Microscope

Rob and Kristen!!!

1. Can you imagine living your life under such scrutiny

as Rob and Kristen?

Can you imagine having your picture taken...

Thousands of times

and then having people blow up each pixel

looking for flaws?

"Oh look a pimple!"

"Is that dandruff?"

"She has earwax!!"

Seriously.

So many pictures of Rob and Kristen are taken at events...

And what do people focus on?

The ones where their eyes are half open

or they are making a funny face because

in that split second...

They decided to breathe or blink.

Big Green Eyes... and they're as wide as the moon.

I think Kristen looks GORGEOUS here...

Look at that FACE.

And her eyes...

Well...

We all know what Robert thinks of them

Heh.

And lets talk about this 'event' that happened on Friday.

Kristen went to Paul McCartney's Video premiere.

Big Brouhaha (and really ha ha ha)

And OH MY!

So much fucking drama.

Let me count the ways!

1. Kristen wasn't with Rob!

I guess the surgery separating them at the hip worked!

Let's all forget how many times in the past weeks

that Rob and Kristen were seen together canoodling

and being all sweet and cute

(And really... Rob flew to Paris for her!!)

Let's just forget all the sightings of them being close

and holding hands and being Rob and Kristen.

YES.

Let's just focus on the fact that Kristen went to 

a work related event

(But damn... PAUL McCARTNEY!!! I want that job!!)

And Robert didn't turn up on her arm.

OH WOE IS ME!

As usual...

All past togetherness is negated so the 

Nervous Nellies who need constant

reassurance of the most fucking obvious relationship

can fuss and fret over where Rob was

and of course...

As SOON as Kristen or Rob show up anywhere 

without the other...

We get "THEY BROKE UP"

But wait... it gets better.

Where's the Ring! The RING??

2. The end of the world is upon us!!

Kristen wasn't wearing her rings!

APOCALYPSE!

ARMAGEDDON!

How can we possibly go on?

How??

The most amusing part of all this...

Is both sides of the lunatic fringe

put so much importance on Kristen's jewelry.

As much as the Scared Shippers cling to their

hopes and dreams of the meaning of the 'rings'

So do the Nasty Ninnies.

They notice what Kristen is wearing probably 

more than ANYONE.

"The better to criticize, my dear".

So when Kristen shows up without the all important

band of gold

(Is there a song in there somewhere?)

They cling to it as proof of a broken relationship.

And then next time Kris is wearing the rings?

Back to square one.

(Oh... and don't forget about the 'new' necklace. Bwahaha)

Round and Round you go...

Adorkable: See Robert Pattinson

He's just walking...

3. I said it on Twitter...

And it bears repeating

Robert on the set of REMEMBER ME

was one of the best Roberts EVER.

And walking Robert on the set of REMEMBER ME?

Well.

Suffice to say...

I'm feeling a little bit like the Wicked Witch

from the Wizard of Oz

What a world... what a world.

Truth is fucking Truth.

4. And is it possible?

Could it be?

MORE DRAMA?

Lunatic Fringe

There are going to be reshoots for BD2.

OH
MY
GOD!!!
How desperate is Summit for PR?

They are pretending to have reshoots

just so they can attach themselves to Cosmopolis!

At least that's what the Fringe would have you believe.

It's not strange at all to have to go back and do 

this sort of thing.

They have done it before.

Other movies have done it.

BD2 is 7 months away from release.

It's part of movie making.

The REAL problem is that Rob and Kristen

will be together on set again...

being Edward and Bella.

And that grates on the Fringe.

They pretend like Twilight is all over...

and act like there still isn't another movie still to come.

Fools.

Besides...

Rob and Kristen don't need anything to bring 

them together.

They already are together

in every way...

that matters.

I want to be Kristen!

So no amount of voodoo hating

on Rob and Kristen 

is going to change that.

EVER.

5. There really are a lot of silly names in this fandom.

The worst being 

Robsten

Nonsten

Nonbert

I can tolerate "Robsten" (barely)

only because it represents 2 people

who are very much together...

and in love.

But Nonsten... Nonbert?

Different sides of the same coin.

NO Kristen. NO Robert.

Hate is hate.

Whether its Rob or Kristen

It's pathetic.

Hating on either of them is never going to change

how they live their life.

Being a NON seems to give you the entitlement

to decide who/what is best for Rob and Kristen.

Like you have a say in what they do

And how they do it.

Sorry.

NONsense.

Rob and Kristen seem to have it figured out...

They've been doing just fine the last three years.

They don't want or need your input.

The BEST is yet to come

and won't that be fine...

You think you've seen the sun

But you ain't seen it shine.

Serious Sturridge

6. I love these pics of Tom from a modeling shoot.

He's all shaggy and serious...

And the pic on the left looks like it was taken

by Matthew Brady...

(Please tell me you know who I'm referring to...)

See what I mean?

He's kinda famous for taking pics of the 16th president...

(Please tell me you know who I'm referring to)

Which brings us back to my original thought.

I adore Thomas Sturridge whether he has a beard or not.

Whether he's serious or smiling

(although his smile breaks my heart)

And I'm hoping against hope

(is that possible?)

That Thomas goes to Cannes for OTR.

With Kristen.

And Robert.

And well...

Maybe I will just stop there.

Enough poking fun of the drama for today.

Nudge. Nudge.

Final thought?

Robert and Kristen

Are in Los Feliz

K-I-S-S-I-N-G

First comes love

Then comes...

Well... You know how it goes.

This post is brought to you by Rings.

Lord of the Rings.

Ringleader.

Ringo Starr.

Adoring.

Ring of the Nibelung.

And by birthday presents.

Another ring?

Until next time.

Bye for now

Perceptions Aren't Reality

 **WARNING**

** STUPIDITY SHOULD BE PAINFUL**

**PROCEED AT YOUR OWN RISK**

Honestly.

I'm dizzy.

I have gotten so many DMs

So many emails...

All discussing me having the audacity to talk 

to a known 'nonbert'.

For not defending Robert.

For picking on Oregano.

Really.

There is so much wrong with all of this bullshit.

1. I keep getting shit for not defending Robert.

This must come from people who don't really

take time to read what I have to say...

Or they have serious comprehension problems.

I defend Robert all the time.

I can't even count how many times I defended his 'honor'

when he was called a drunken manwhore...

or when he happened to be in the same zip code 

as some washed up desperate famewhore.

But no...

I don't go policing the fandom

looking for people who don't agree with me.

That's not my job.

If it comes to my attention...

I will always fight for Rob.

I adore him.

He's the reason I'm here.

Well... and this...

And this...

(OK... so I was going through my Rob 'walking' file

and decided to pull out 2 of my all time favorites.

Shut up)

2. I love that people feel the need to not only police my tweets...

 but go through who I follow and who follows me.

(that is a lie... its sarcasm for those of you 

who have no fucking sense of humor or intelligence)

So I exchange a few words with someone once in a while...

Now we are BEST FRIENDS FOREVER??

How does THAT work?

And why do so many have such a narrow view of the world?

Am I responsible for what people do on their own time?

Am I supposed to police everyone's tweets that I follow?

Do you personally know everyone you follow?

Do you even like everyone you follow?

Don't you ever want a different point of view?

Don't you ever want to talk to someone

who you might not always agree with...

but you can have a civil discussion?

Or do you just stick to the same boring people

who parrot the same boring thing

day after day?

I follow people I find interesting...

They don't have to be a clone of me

and my opinions.

In fact...

There are quite a few I follow that I don't 

particularly like at all...

But sometimes they have clever insights

or are amusing...

Or are just entertaining

(Nikki Reed comes to mind... hahaha)

So basically what I'm saying is...

Don't worry about me.

I rarely spend more than 1/2 an hour on Twitter a day.

Can you say the same?

Maybe you should be more worried about yourself.

And why you think this is SO important...

And why you can't just laugh and have fun with it.

This is how I picture a lot of 'fans'... hahaha!

3. Oregano.

The bland, flaky, shorty spice.

I knew my post poking fun at him would get some people

all worked up.

But again...

This isn't serious business people!

I called him short and boring.

Two things I happen to think he is.

Its not the end of the world.

Maybe you love and adore him...

Maybe you are intoxicated with him.

So start your own damn blog and you

can say he's tall and exciting!

See how easy that is?

And maybe...

Just maybe...

I have my own reasons for feeling the way

I do about the stale spice.

4. Someone had the nerve...

to tell me I shouldn't blog about Thomas.

Can you imagine?

What is this world coming to???

Honestly.

I mention Tom at the end of every post...

but I don't really wax poetic novels about him...

Do I?

I mean...

I COULD.

But I don't.

But come on...

Tom is all sorts of adorable.

And do I really have to bring up the whole

MY BLOG

MY THOUGHTS

I will post as I please stuff again?

Good.

Dreaming or Dreamy?

And while I'm on the topic of Thomas...

I guess I will just throw in this picture

and this quote from his recent interview

with Wonderland Magazine

“The one power I have in these situations 

is to choose not to talk about it for once.” 

How can you NOT love that?

Well...

I do.

OHMYGOD She is just absolutely gorgeous.

5. I also adore Kristen Stewart.

I'm a fan.

I happen to love both Robert and Kristen.

And Tom.

It's not about their relationship.

It's about them.

Their individual careers and personalities.

Having Rob and Kristen fall in love

and be all happy and sweet

is just icing on the proverbial cake.

Tom is the filling.

So yeah...

I'm having my fucking cake

and eating it too.

And guess what?

It's fucking 

DELICIOUS.

It's a good thing I love cake.

6. Good Grief.

I've NEVER called myself an INSIDER.

EVER.

Those are labels pinned on me by other people.

Besides...

If you were truly an insider...

You wouldn't talk about it.

There wouldn't be a need to.

You know what I mean?

Someone who had access to information...

Who knew things

Would never betray Rob and Kristen.

Because what would be more important?

Honoring a friendship...

Or getting your 15 minutes of fame?

Easy answer.

FOREVER

So in closing...

This post is brought to you by perceptions.
They aren't always reality.

And by Thomas Sturridge.
Whom I completely adore
whether you like it or not.

One more quote from Mr. Sturridge

which I think is apt for this post...

"It's acting.

I’m not fucking up surgery.

 No one’s getting killed.”

Indeed Thomas... indeed.

It's a blog.

No one's getting killed.

Until next time

Bye for now

Rob and Kristen- Sugar and Spice

**WARNING**

**SARCASM ALERT**

**SENSE OF HUMOR REQUIRED**

**READ AT YOUR OWN RISK**

 The post you are about to read is true.

My true opinion.

I'm going to discuss Michael Oregano...

And I know how upset some people get

when Saint Michael 

the martyr of Robsten is discussed in any capacity

other than "he must be a good guy".

Right.

So don't read this if your self righteous sensibilities

will get all bent out of shape.

Or do.

It's just a post on a blog after all.

Not etched in fucking stone.

Sad. Stumpy. Spice.

 This is an old picture from the days of 

Wheres Oregano?

You know... the silly little videos where the jar of shorty spice

was always lurking behind Kristen and Robert.

 Maybe it's just me...

But that's all Oregano seemed to do back in the day...

Follow Kristen around.

I guess its not a bad job if you think about it.

If you don't mind being in someone elses shadow...

ANYWAY.

The reason for this post is a tweet that was

sent to me recently.

I'm sure you all saw it by now...

Supposedly on Kristen's birthday

Michael's cousin made the grand gesture of tweeting

(Her name has been removed because she deleted the tweet

after realizing how bitchy it was)

 Happy birthday #KristinStewart ! 

Say hi to Michael Angarano for me

 oooh wait you dumped my cousin..

WELL!

Can you imagine the Hub Bub... Bub?

Kristen Stewart had the AUDACITY to dump this girl's cousin!

How dare she!

And then you know what happens... right?

You get the straggler ninnies

(You know... the ones that still cling to their delusions)

who then proceed to go on a rant about how

1. Kristen and Rob cheated on Oregano...

2. Kristen must have realized she was gay

so that's why she broke up with him.

3. Kristen was deliriously happy with Oregano

but Summit made her end the relationship.

Blah blah fucking blah.

Really?

Kristen was a teenager when she dated Shorty Spice.

A mere lass.

So... where does it say she can never move on

from a teenage romance?

A high school fling?

She must remain with him out of some sort

of perplexing loyalty?

Huh?

I know this topic has been done to fucking death.

But good lord.

Kristen was dating the bland dried up spice...

They had a few laughs

But you know what happens when you are a mere lass of 17?

You fucking grow up.

And you move on.

SEE!!! I can look just like him!

It just so happens that Kristen moved on with Robert.

Not a bad move.

Nope.

Not at all.

So Kristen fell for Robert Pattinson.

Didn't we all?

So she lets go of her childhood infatuation...

and moves on to a more mature

and REAL relationship.

What's wrong with that?

Why must 'cheating' be involved at all?

She was dating Mike Oregano

Then she's not.

She starts dating Robert.

Simple.

Soapy Oregano? Bwahahaha!

No one wants to be 'dumped'

but it happens to everyone somewhere along the line

doesn't it?

Even Robert got dumped a few times along the way

(and I'm sure the ex's are kicking themselves for that one)

It's not the end of the world...

Shorty Spice is still out there

being bland and diminutive

Still lurking...

Maybe letting others speak for him

every now and then.

If you know what I mean...

And I think that you do.

Robert is definitely Prince Charming... is there a Stumpy Dwarf?

He's not Saint Michael...

He's not some wronged scorned angel

He's a guy who was dating a girl...

And they broke up.

Get over it.

I can guarantee you that Kristen has.

THIS is the face of LOVE.

And one more thing...

Will people ever stop with the bullshit

that Summit dictates every facet of Kristen's (and Rob's) life?

They break up previous relationships

Force 2 actors to pretend to be together for years

Make endless people 'lie' about how wonderful it is

working with Kristen

and about her adorable relationship with Robert.

Pay off cities and states and countries

Make the whole world believe their lies

JUST to promote movies that need no promotion.

But remember...

If Summit has complete and total control over 

every move Robert and Kristen make

(Paddle boarding for PR!!!)

Tell me again why they couldn't stop Kristen from 

cutting her hair for The Runaways?

(Watching it the other day made me think of this again)

They can force her to lose years of her love life

Telling her Who to see

Where to go

What to do

But they can't stop her from something as simple

(and honestly... hair IS something studios do control

Look at Emma Watson and how quickly she cut her

hair after Harry Potter was over)

As NOT cutting her hair?

They wrote all those other life controlling things

into this fictional contract...

But forgot to add the haircut clause!!

Imagine That!

This post is brought to you by the 'EPIC LOVE'

Looks pretty good to me...

Is it Epic?

That's not for you or me to decide.

That's completely up to them.

We don't get a say.

But it is love.

That much is...

well...

Obvious.

Truth is fucking truth.

And this post is also brought to you by...

Adore.

Thomas Sturridge.

I can't wait to see what his next move is...

Sugar and Spice...

and EVERYTHING nice.

Until next time

Bye for now

P.S. If you were offended by this post...

All I have to say is

Lighten the fuck up, Francis

It's really not that serious.

Truly.

Happy Birthday Kristen Stewart!

If you're sitting comfortably... then let me begin.
I want to tell you a tale about the mess I'm in.
And it all starts with a girl... And she's breaking up my whole world.

HAPPY 22ND BIRTHDAY

KRISTEN STEWART!

Our girl is 22 years old...

It seems like only yesterday she was 17

I was going to change the banner for Kristen's day...

You know... Kristen Stewart Intoxication!

But someone told me that the picture of

Robert with the hoodie

is one of her favorite pictures of him.

Essential Robert.

So keeping that banner is the least I can do...

(Such a sacrifice! Hahaha!)

What is there to say really?

There are a million other blogs out there

spilling over with love and affection for Kristen.

Videos and endless pictures as tribute

on her special day.

I'm glad so many people are showing their love for her.

She's got this big green eyes and they're as wide as the moon
Yeah, they can take you to bed without leaving the room.
I would kill just to be her man... but she's too cool to give a damn.

It's good to see how loved she is...

How many people adore her.

Because Kristen is completely adorable and lovable.

And I love seeing positive happy things being said about her.

It makes me smile.

I'm falling in love for the last time, I'm falling in love forever and ever.
Falling in love with a girl that ain't mine. I'm falling in love for the last time.

You might notice that I'm using the lyrics

to "Falling in love for the last time"

Which I'm still convinced was written for Kristen...

(by Rob)

Imagine having someone so smitten over you

So taken

So in love

(for the last time)

That he has to express himself in song...

Do you think Rob has written Kristen a lot of songs?

I bet she inspires a lot of emotion in him.

Imagine having Robert strumming his guitar

and singing a song written just for you...

Kinda blows your mind... doesn't it?

"Falling in love for the last time"

is probably only the first of many.

Imagine Rob putting out an album of music

Imagine the songs inspired by Kristen

that will be on it...

Wouldn't that be a wonderful birthday present?

I'm falling in love for the last time...
I'm falling in love forever and ever.

I simply adore Kristen Stewart.

There are qualities about her that I relate to...

There is something about her that makes me want to protect her.

There are so many things I admire about her.

I hope she has a big smile on her face ALL day long today...

And that she is surrounded by people who love her.

I hope Bear gives her a sloppy kiss

and that she spend her birthday doing exactly what she wants to do.

I'm falling in love for the last time... I'm falling in love forever and ever.

Most of all...

I hope she knows how loved she is.

What she means to so many people.

And when she blows out her birthday candles today

and looks across the table into Robert's eyes

(because you know he's right there smiling)

I hope she realizes that her wishes and dreams have come true

He's right there... next to her.

Loving her.

Forever and ever.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KRISTEN

This post is brought to you 

by Kristen Stewart's Birthday!

She has spent the last 4 birthdays with Robert...

I wonder what he has planned for her today?

And what would a post be without 

Thomas Sturridge?

The glasses... are killing me.

I adore Thomas...

It's a wonderful birthday!

Kristen deserves every happy moment

Every smile

Every kiss

Every hug

Every "I love you"

It's a twirly kinda day.

Smile and be Happy!

Until next time...

Bye for now