The information, content and images on
these pages are purely in fun
and are in no way meant to cause anyone harm, grief or despair.
If you are sensitive and lack a sense of humor,
please, don't go any further.
Some places, names, and events are fictional
and any resemblance, likeness,
or similarity to any person living or dead
is purely coincidental.

Wednesday, July 12, 2017

We'll Always Have Forks...

I've been kinda busy lately.
Life comes at you pretty hard sometimes.
Is that a line from a movie?

There has been LOTS of Rob and Kristen
(and even some Thomas )
in the news.

Rob was at some Dior thingy
Kristen was at some Chanel thingy
They both looked
I mean...
with a fucking capital P.

And be honest...
Did it make you kinda giddy that Dean was there with Rob?
all is right with the world.
Things are as they should be.


Isn't it wonderful that BOTH
Rob and Kristen
are doing so well in their careers?
They are getting wonderful reviews from critics.
They BOTH look incredible.
They seem happy with their lives.
Isn't it great?

I wish it would be so easy and peaceful.
But alas...
We still get the idiots who have to trash one
to build up the other.
And I mean that on all sides of the aisle.
(Can an aisle have more than 2 sides?)

Take this recent incident... for example.
Rob and Kristen were on the SAME FLIGHT
from Paris to LAX.
OH NO!!!!

The angst
The bitterness
The anger
The giddiness
The nostalgia
The laughs
The endless searching of airplane seating charts!
(It was all fucking hilarious... really)

So HKN and LoonLurker and their crew were SOOOO happy!
Truth Bombs People!
Because if you ride on the same flight as someone...
It means
It means
It means you are secretly married with 3 babies
and you are about to SHARE THE TRUTH
with the world!
Who could possibly miss these kind of signs??
Rob and Kristen had cars waiting for them
and they were parked NEXT to each other!!
They walked through the SAME airport
and out the SAME doors!

And don't you know...

That crease...
That crease on her flat tummy
that's PROOF of her having 3 babies!
Some sort of c-section scar...
It's her showing the world that she is
Maybe twins this time!
(Bella and Edward!!)
Babies number 4 and 5!!
It's from sitting on a plane for 11 hours.
(nah... that's too sane)
I mean...
Kristen's Mom Jules LIKED the pic!
That means BABIES!!!

Yeah... pretty fucking CRAZY isn't it?
And it never stops.
No matter that Kristen was on the plane
with her girlfriend, Stella.
Let's just ignore that Stella has been in her life
EVERYWHERE in her life for months.
Let's just ignore all the pictures of Rob and Twigs
that have been out there for years.
Let's just scream PR! PHOTOSHOP!
whenever something comes up that shows
that you are completely delusional.
Let's ignore every rational thought
 and focus on that crease!

And let's not forget the PRessed 'fans' OK?
Some of them were pulling out airplane seating charts...
We can't have Rob sitting near Kristen!!
There had to be other flights!
Rob and/or Kristen wouldn't fly on purpose on the same plane!
Was this some bizarre PR move by Kristen?
Was she trying to 'cash in' on Rob... AGAIN?
It burns their biscuits
that Rob and Kristen were in close proximity
for any length of time
Even though as I mentioned before...
Kristen was with Stella.
(Poor Stella... always thrown aside)
And Rob and Kristen have been broken up for years
There were all these bitter rants...
(My favorite being this one)

No shit?
It was a fucking plane ride, Dickwad.
Why so fucking worried?

No one has any idea what kind of relationship
Rob and Kristen may or may not have.
They could be friendly.
They could talk.
Who knows?
It doesn't mean they are going to run back
into each others arms... 
Does anyone really want that at this point?
(OK... Don't fucking answer that.)
Let's face it...
No matter where they are now
No matter if they talk or not
Even if they hate each others guts...
Kristen will always have so much more of Rob
than you ever will.

There has been an endless showings
of Twilight... New Moon... etc
on TV lately.

I read that some people have a hard time
watching these movies.
I don't feel that way.
I enjoy them.
Twilight and New Moon especially.
They make me smile.
Rob and Kristen make me smile.
They were so in love...
and going through the Twilight Tornado...

Their bond was so strong.
It was fun to watch.
It may be over
but we'll always have Forks.

This post is brought to you by the letter L
and the letter T.

L for
Fucking LET it go.
Stop bitching about Kristen for just ONE day.
Do you think its possible?
Stop insulting Rob for 24 hours...
Can you do it?
Stop comparing Kristen and Twigs
and leave them both alone.
Stop using one as an excuse to bash the other.
Stop pretending you know what is going on
in their personal lives.
You don't.
Stop vomiting bullshit and declaring it the truth.
Just because you say it...
doesn't make it TRUE.

T for...


He's in the play 1984
and let's talk about how quirky and weird Tom is.
I love it.
He's so... Tom.
Part of his ENORMOUS charm.

Green Sheep.
Fucking Forever.

P.S. New Moon is on my TV right now...
and my favorite quote was just on

Jake- I love you
So... Please... don't make me choose.
Because it will be him.
It's always been him.

It's always been him.
I loved Bella and Edward.
I will always miss them.

And then forever.

Until next time

Bye for now.

Sunday, April 9, 2017

27 Years a Kristen.

Happy Birthday

I could easily go on a long winded spiel
about the whys and hows 
of my complete
and utter
Kristen Stewart...

I've decided to just post a few of my 
favorite pictures
and maybe just try to put into words
my thoughts about her.

I'm not sure exactly when
my thoughts about Kristen changed...
Before Twilight I didn't really know much about her.
And I have to admit that I was kinda jealous
when I found out she was BELLA
to Robert's EDWARD.

I guess that's when it began.

When I started watching her and Rob
fall in love.
I became fascinated with her.
She gave these quirky
And I found myself wanting to know more.

 She made movies that I found fascinating.
And I wanted to see more.
She said things that made me think.
And I wanted to hear more.

She marched to the beat
of her own drum...
And she became polarizing.

The more Rob loved Kristen...
The more some people hated her.
No matter what she did.
She didn't have to do anything.
She was constantly
and brutally attacked
on social media.

I found myself defending her.
I'm not even sure why I felt the need
protect her.
But I did.
Here was this tiny little girl...
(and keep in mind a lot of the abuse 
she received was when she was a teenager)
Who wasn't hurting anyone...
Just loving her boyfriend
living her life...

I continued to defend her...
Even when she hurt Robert.
Because no matter how you want to look at it...
We don't know what happened between them.
We only know scattered bits and pieces.
Rob took her back.
Rob forgave her.
Rob still loved her.

Even if I was disappointed...
(I hate to see anyone get hurt)
It wasn't my place to judge her.
She didn't do anything to me.
It wasn't my relationship...

But this was the breaking point for many.
They couldn't get past it.
They behaved as the jilted lover...
The attacks were vile and bitter.

And yet...
I saw a girl who was hurting too.
I still wanted to shield her.
Stop the hate from reaching her.
I couldn't help it.

No one who judged her
(and continues to do so to this day)
can sit back and claim to never
have hurt someone...
To be free from sin
To be free from doing something they regret.

I believe Rob and Kristen truly loved each other
But sometimes that's not enough.
Sometimes you grow up...
and relationships... don't.

One of the things I love about her the most...
is her fierce determination
to just live her life on her terms.

She's not worried if you approve.
She's not concerned if you don't agree.

A lot of people judge her life
based on what THEY would do
in her situation.
But it doesn't work that way.
So what if you would have 'time alone'
after a break up...
So what if you wouldn't want your friends
hanging around all the time...
So what if you disagree with the
way she chooses to live her life.
So what.
You live your life your way...
let Kristen live hers the way she wants to.
You have to realize by now
that Kristen will rarely do what you want 
her to do...
If it upsets you so much
that you get angry and frustrated and judgey
maybe you should ask yourself why.

I have had people ask me why I was such a fan
of Kristen's.

I'm not quite sure I can put it into words.

I find her completely captivating on screen.
I can't look away
and want her to be in every frame.
I love most of her movies.
Even the weird strange roles...
It doesn't matter.
If Kristen is in it?
I want to watch it.

Kristen is devastatingly beautiful.
I mean...

 I realize that's not a reason to admire someone...
But I love that she's so damn gorgeous
and it doesn't seem to matter to her at all.
Like its not that important
in the grand scheme of things..
And I guess that's true.

I love that Kristen's career has been 
on fucking fire for the last coupe of years...
and that she is getting some of the best reviews ever.
She keeps getting better
and better.
And I will admit that I love
that her critics have had to swallow
their bitter pills
when they claimed she was "OVER"
and that she would never work again.

Silly Ninnies.

I love that she's not afraid to try new things.

Starring in a Rolling Stone video.
Shaving off her hair.
Hosting Saturday Night Live.

She's brave.
Even when she knows she might fail...
She still tries.

She's honest.
She says things that she believes...
even when its not always the most popular opinion.

She's flawed.
Like every other human being out there.
But that's part of her incredible charm.

She loves animals.
How can you not love someone
who loves her puppies so damn much?

She's awkward and real
and says how she feels
and sometimes she doesn't express herself
in the best way...
or sometimes she says
or does something I don't agree with.
But I still admire
that she's there
trying to explain what she's thinking.

It's not that easy to do.

I should know.
I just tried to explain how I felt about Kristen
on her 27th birthday...
and I have rambled on and on
trying to make sense of my thoughts.
It's hard to put feelings into words sometimes.

This post is brought to you by 
Kristen Stewart.

Happy 27th Birthday!

I hope you have happiness
and love and peace and joy
this day
and every day.

You deserve all of it.

Until next time

Bye for now.

Tuesday, April 4, 2017

And the Beat Goes On...

I'm lazy, aren't I?
I just can't seem to get motivated to open my laptop
and post a few words on this blog.

It's not that there hasn't been stuff to talk about...
I do still check social media
and try to stay 'current'.
But I have to admit that ever since
Humpty Trumpty was elected...
This country's welfare has been
at the forefront of my brain.
It's scary.

But to be honest...
I did write a rather lengthy post
right after Kristen hosted SNL

Because lo and behold...
God, she was good.
And of course she looked gorgeous doing it.
If you are a fan of Kristen's...
then you enjoyed every damn minute.

And if you aren't a fan of Kristen's...
I know you couldn't take your eyes off of her either.
And it annoyed the hell outta you
that she didn't suck.
Which in turn...
sucks for you.

Then of course...
She said FUCK on live TV.
Look at her.
How cute is she?
She was so excited...
so IN the damn moment...
She was as shocked as anyone.
God...she's so adorable.
Cussing and all.

One of the things I admire about Kristen
is that even when she's afraid...
She's brave.

Another reason I didn't post my last blog
was because... like... 
the next couple of days after that was all about Rob.
He did red carpet for LCOZ!!!
It seems like its been ages since Rob did promo
but seeing Rob in a suit somehow
makes everything better.

I'm really thinking that he makes that look so easy.
and he brought Twigs...

And they looked REALLY happy.
Don't they?
It's good to see Rob smile like that...
isn't it?

And I know that it's completely selfish of me
but another reason I love pics like this
is because it sends the Baby Loons into a panic.
Yes people
They STILL insist that Rob and Kristen are married
with 3 kids.
Completely ignoring pictures like Rob and Twigs
so OBVIOUSLY together
and this...

Kristen so OBVIOUSLY
in a relationship with Stella Maxwell.
(and aren't they all kinds of cute?)

I guess I will never understand why they can't 
just accept that Rob and Kristen broke up YEARS ago
and have moved on.

Just like some people can't accept that Kristen
will love who she wants to love...
be it male or female.
The heart wants what it wants.
And that Rob loves Twigs.
Admit it.
Accept it.

Reality is... it doesn't matter who they love.
Because it's not up to us.
It's not about us.
And it shouldn't affect us.
Stop using their relationships to attack them.
Stop comparing them.
Stop making it a competition.
Stop looking if you don't like what you see.
Stay in your lane.


Kristen has been way busy with making movies
Directing movies...
Promoting movies...
And the one most talked about right now is
Personal Shopper.
Personally... I haven't seen it yet
(although I can't wait)
but she is getting RAVE reviews.
And by RAVE, I mean WONDERFUL.

In addition to Kristen getting great critical response
the movie is doing pretty well
in limited release
(never near me, of course)

I know I've said it before
and I will probably say it always...
But Kristen is MAGNETIC onscreen.
You WANT to watch her.
And you feel a void when shes not there.
As she matures...
She just keeps getting better.

I haven't seen LCOZ either.
Although I really want to.
I'm not sure how good the movie is doing...
But Rob is getting great reviews.

And I love Beardy Rob.
Maybe not THAT much beard
but I prefer men with facial hair.

This has always been one of my favorite bearded moments.
I mean.

Speaking of BEARDS...

This post is brought to you by
a man of many beards...

Tom always seems to have a beard...
which is good.
It suits him
and makes his blue eyes...
The blue-est.

Man... I adore him.
And guess what?

Reed Birney, Olivia Wilde, and Tom Sturridge 
Will Lead Cast of Broadway's 1984.

I've always believed that Tom was happiest on stage.
It's where he seems most comfortable...
it's where he belongs.
Now I just need to set up a trip to NYC

This post is brought to you by the letters

1. To the people who keep bringing up Kristen's sexuality
like its an insult.
(Why does it scare you so much?
Why do you care?
Why is it even a big deal?)

2. To the people who constantly trash Twigs
just because Rob fell in love with her.
(It's just another version of Nonstens)

3. To the people who can't accept that 
Rob and Kristen are no longer together.
You are severely insane)

4. To the people who think they know Rob's and Kristen's
lives and how they feel.
(You don't know DICKSHIT)

5. To the people who never have anything nice to say
about Rob and/or Kristen
(They say they "don't care")
but still watch and read every thing about them
and then talk about them ALL THE TIME.

And most of all?
To Donald Trump.
Because every thing you say is a lie.
You, sir...
are NOT my president.

Until next time.

Drums keep pounding
A rhythm to the brain

Bye for now.

Sunday, January 29, 2017

I'm Still Standing...

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times,
 it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness,
 it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity
 it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, 
it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair...
- Charles Dickens

That was written in 1859.
I mean...
Doesn't it somehow always fit 
the times we live in?

I realized I hadn't written here
in over 2 months.
I guess the presidential election
or may not
have influenced that.
Probably may.
Definitely may.

I'm usually not incredibly political...
I vote my heart.
My conscience.
Regardless of 'party'.
I vote for whomever I believe
will be the best person...
for our country.

Needless to say,
I didn't vote for Donald Trump.
And while this may offend some people...
I cannot
I will not
ever understand those who did.
I will forever look at people who voted for him...
Even those I love.

That's all I'm going to say about that.
For now.
I do believe the boat will right itself
in due time...
and as karma often does
it will go around
and come all the fucking way back around.

OK then.

Let's talk about 2016.
It ended up being a shit year
didn't it?
Not really for me, personally...
I had weddings 
and babies being born
and happiness and joy.
So it couldn't be ALL bad.
Election results aside...
It just ended on such a fucking bummer.
So many good, talented
wonderful people died.
Many way way (WAY) before their time.
I felt punched in the gut more than once.
The following hit me the hardest...
David Bowie
Alan RIckman 
Glenn Frey 
George Martin 
Garry Shandling
Muhammad Ali
Anton Yelchin
Gene Wilder
Florence Henderson
George Michael
Debbie Reynolds
and most of all
Carrie Fisher

Every one of these people affected my life in some way...
Made it better. 
Made me smile.
Made me think.
Carrie Fisher was somehow the most 
devastating to me...
Maybe because she was flawed
She made mistakes and she owned them...
But she was brilliantly funny
and smart
and had an incredible sense of humor.
I adored her.
It hurt to say goodbye.

And what was the BEST and WORST
of this fandom in 2016?

I wish I could find something new to say.

The Best?
Kristen had a phenomenal 2016.
Critical praise.
Lots of interesting projects.
(Rolling Stone video? Who saw that one coming?)
She even directed her own short film "Come Swim"
that went to Sundance.
Girl is on fire and IN CHARGE.
Oh and to add fuel to the flames...
This girl is going to be on Saturday Night Live
this coming weekend.
Live TV.
I mean.
Huge step for her... yes?
I'm beyond thrilled for her
because I believe she will be wonderful...
but damn... I'm nervous, too.
I want her to do well
but comedy is fucking hard.
I cannot wait.

As a fan... I really can't ask for anything more...
Except for MORE.
I can't wait to see everything she does
and will do.
She is endlessly fascinating
and magnetically watchable.

The worst?

Well, you know.

Still have the HardlyKnowsNothing's of the fandom
who still want to claim Kristen is married to Rob
with 3 bouncing babies attached to her hips
(and incredibly... number 4 'on the way')
And there are still the people out there
who want to argue with them everyday.

Day in.
Day out.
Same bullshit
Over and Over
and then over again.
What exactly is anyone really trying to prove?
It's one thing to have an opinion
But you aren't getting anywhere fighting on twitter
everyday repeating yourself.
As far as I can see...
It's jut an excuse for one side to shit 
all over Twigs...
While the other side shits all over Kristen.
What a fantastic way to spend your time!
You all do know the definition of insanity...
Insanity is, 
doing the exact same fucking thing over and over again,
 expecting shit to change. 
That. Is. Crazy.

It's not going to change.
Rob has been with Twigs for YEARS now...
and it's been well documented.
Kristen has been dating women...
and she's one of the most photographed women
in the world.
No question who she is spending her time with.
There hasn't been a real picture of Rob and Kristen
together since 2013.
If that doesn't have an effect on the
insane delusional conspiracies?
What will?

Rob has had a relatively quiet year...
He has been working on interesting movies
with good directors
He's been pretty low key.
Which I'm sure is exactly what he wants.
He's been in a long term relationship
with Twigs
and seems happy with the choices he's made.
Maybe once more of his movies come out...
We will get to see more of him.
Pulling his fingers through his hair...

Being all awkward and cute.

Tom Sturridge.
Tom has been working much like Rob...
Working on projects that mean 
something to him.
Staying close to his daughter.
Wearing hats.
And goofy 'jumpers'.
Not really smiling much...
but when he does?

Look out.
Thank you, Ma'am.


The same tired asshats who continually judge Kristen
for basically breathing.
Kristen was at Sundance...
Talking about motivation behind her movie
"Come Swim"

She talked about heartbreak...
things she wanted to say.

And what did the asshats do?
Piss and moan about how Kristen
is using Rob for promotion!
Is that it, really?
How many songs...
are based on peoples feelings...
things that happen in their lives
heartbreak and love and pain?
Just about everything, you know?
But oh no...
Kristen is NOT allowed to do what others
have done before her.
How dare she?
Who does she think she is bringing up Rob!
Its only her life, after all.
Her relationship.
Her heartache.
Her pain.
Her love.
And just like so many do every single day
 using their feelings and experiences for art
she uses what she lived.
And honestly...
Do you really think Rob cares?
Uh huh.
Sure. Sure.

I don't usually talk about Twigs
except in passing about Rob.
I've kinda made it a thing to not discuss
Rob and Kristen's relationships.
It's so much easier to not care
and not be invested... 
But I did want to say this about Twigs

Her and Nike are a great fit.
She's a helluva dancer.

This post is brought to you by
the number 9.

It is still a number that shows up in my life
all the time.

Until next time.

Bye for now.