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Monday, June 1, 2009

"This Is The Last Time You'll Ever See Me."



*deep breath*
I'm not sure where to start here...
So I guess at the beginning?

1. It's about 7:20pm... 40 minutes until the MTV Movie Awards.
I'm on the laptop... bantering back and forth on the G-spot...
And I am watching "The fucking Hills"...
Why?
Because at commercial breaks they go to the red carpet.
I might see Rob.
I'm losing IQ points every time this Heidi chick comes onscreen.
Is she for real? WTF is she thinking?
OK.
So about 10 minutes into this Hubby has had enough.
"Why are you watching this shit?"
I want to say...
"Well, dear, I might get a glimpse of the man of my dreams...
the man I lust after, the man I am addicted to..."

But I settle for...

"Um... I'm not really watching this... just waiting for another show"

Good thing "GOBLET OF FIRE" is on another channel...
So I get to see Rob anyway.

2. The show starts. They show Rob immediately.
My stomach is in knots. WHY?
Rob wins "Best Fight"... and fucking thanks his stuntman!
This is why I love him so.

3. OK. Now I have gotten a good look at Rob.
He is wearing a blue linen jacket that looks like it is a few
sizes too small... and has never seen an iron.
He's wearing his favorite Nikes.
His shirt... is buttoned incorrectly... does he do that on purpose?
Or was he having crazy limo sex with Kristen on the way over?
I'm not sure... Cuz she looks pretty (as always) but way mussed up.
She needs a comb... but damn... they look good together.

4. Rob and Kristen win for BEST KISS. *shock*
They play the audience... and then proceeded to cockblock
and not kiss at all! Way to stay true to the books!!
Rob's face is priceless... and Kristen... is too cute for words.

5. Twilight pretty much wins for every category.
The NEW MOON trailer is fucking AWESOME.
Rob looks beautiful in every scene.
Beautiful and soo tortured.
It has the birthday party...
It shows the fucking goodbye in the forest...
OHMYGOD. (I said that outloud)
The pain that rips through my heart just watching that...
And then...
they show Taylor without a shirt...
I audibly GASP...
WHOA.
And then he turns into a wolf.
Excellent.
Chris W is fucking doing this right.
It's brighter, cleaner... and the trailer is already
better than Twilight.
I CAN'T WAIT!!!

6. Couple of observations.

A. Where was Nikki? Where was Oregano?
Can we finally put the whole Oregano/KS thing to rest?
He's so fucking OUT of her life.
He would have been there otherwise.
And Nikki? Where the hell was she?
Holding Oregano in her arms... wiping his tears?
BAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

B. Why is it in every damn picture... Rob's damn agent/manager
has to be there? Can he not function by himself?
Shit. I don't see Kristen with her damn agents following her around.
These two are getting on my nerves.
Even backstage... those two are clinging to him.
Sheesh.
It's getting a bit ridiculous now.
They don't need to fucking glom onto him at every turn.
Very annoying.

C. I enjoyed the awards. Rob looked fantastic...
The cast looked wonderful.
CH was her typical bizarro self.
It was good.

Bye for now


2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Good questions, Rose. I wish I had the answers to some of them. And I WISH I COULD HAVE SEEN THIS!!!!!

Yes - I'm yelling. My freaking Internet is down and I may not get to the end of this comment before it kicks out again. Argh!

But I lurve you! 4evah! Almost as much as Rob (that's alot btw).

Tess said...

I can't wait to see the movie either Rose. The trailer has already surpassed my expectations.

I don't know where MA was? Maybe we'll all know more a few months from now...maybe we won't. As for Stephanie and Nick... Maybe Rob feels more comfortable with them there. Maybe they're make him feel OK..

Love you to bits.
T