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Monday, June 29, 2009

Losing My Religion... Devoted To Rob Pattinson.

This picture wrecks me.
I'm absolutely shattered.


But who the hell am I kidding?
Every damn picture destroys me.
No matter what Rob is doing...
no matter what he is wearing...
no matter the look on his face...
I am completely owned.
No fucking doubt about it.

I had a 'fangirl' encounter yesterday.
And with the experience...
I realized that keeping my ROBsession incognito
is a good thing to do.

So I was hanging out with some friends...
We were sitting around a bonfire...
just shooting the shit.
Well, some spew the shit better than others...
But for some reason a teenage daughter
of one of my friends started gushing about Rob.

Now... that's all fine and good.
Rob is very gushable.
She talked about his hair (gush)
She mentioned his eyes (gush)
She commented on his abs (gush)
and while I was silently gushing...
appreciating all the fine qualities she talked about...

She then began to call him Edward.
I mean... as if that is all he is. was. could be.

(gushes are drying up rapidly)

"Edward is cute and all... but what else has he done?"

"I love Edward's hair, but it's not as hot as Zac's"

"And Edward's voice... it's so weird...
and you can't understand a word he sings."

Yeah. No more gushing.
In fact... is there an opposite of gushing?
I looked it up.
You know what I got?
Trickle. That doesn't work for me.
Well, I could feel my face actually pucker...
Like I had just sucked on a major lemon.

It took really a lot...
I'm talking a monumental effort....
To not defend Rob.
I wanted to tell this clueless girl...
That Rob is so much more than his face...
His hair... his looks.
I wanted to tell her how intelligent he is...
How thoughtful and well spoken.
That Rob is modest and charming...
Witty and so self deprecating.

But I bit my tongue
(honestly, I tasted blood...)
Because I realized it wasn't worth it.
And I realized that if I started
defending Rob...
Not only would people realize
that I knew a bit too much
about Robert Pattinson...
They would realize just how
passionate I am about him.

That would be bad.
Trust me.

So I just gulped down my drink...
And sucked up my nearly
over powering need and desire
to protect and defend
Robert Pattinson.

I'm telling you...
Loving Rob is hard work.
It's a full time job.
It's a religion.
And I'm devoted.

Bye for now


Tenneil said...

Itsnt it though... Kudos for being strong.. your heart is true and lies deep with a passion for Mr Pattinson...

Trixie said...

Rosie - this picture absolutely, 100%, without a doubt... did me in, too.

Not good.

This is not good.

I need big time help.


<3 you BFT 4evah!!

Anonymous said...

You feel very protective of Rob! So do we all. He's so much more than just another teen idol. He's all the things you said - intelligent, thoughtful, well spoken, modest, charming, self-deprecating, talented, witty, well read .... the list goes on and on. ♥ thx for the post!