I had an incredibly busy last few days.
Which means I haven't been online much.
(Which was actually quite nice.)
I only got to pop on for a few minutes here and there...
and guess what?
Same Same Same.
Not that I expected anything to be different.
But when you are gone for a couple of days...
and you get on Twitter
and the fucking conversation hasn't changed??
Well "Face Punch" comes to mind.
After ENDLESS (Fucking ENDLESS) speculation
about where oh where was Kristen Stewart
She turns up at some Lacoste Pool Party at Coachella.
And why wouldn't she?
She got to spend a week with the dreamiest man alive...
and now she gets to have some fun in the sun
While she waits for him to join her.
What's not to be happy about?
Well... there was also constant barking and howling...
You tell me how fucked up this shit is.
1. Before Kristen shows up in Budapest...
The Hyenas are all agitated... circling...
"Kristen better NOT show up in Budapest!
She needs to concentrate on her career and
stop following Rob around wherever he goes!"
2. Kristen DOES show up in Budapest (bwahaha)
OH NO! WHAT SHALL WE DO???
"Kristen is PATHETIC! She should be spending time
with her family and friends. She has NO life!
PR PR PR PR PR PR PR"
3. Robert and Kristen head to London.
"Kristen is only there for PR!!!
PR I say!
Yes! She flew into Budapest airport...
only to turn around and get on a plane to London
with Rob so that the Paps would see them.
Yeah! That's it! Who wouldn't fly on a plane for
14 hours to just hang in an airport and then fly again?
It makes PERFECT sense to me!"
(at this point the foaming is at maximum capacity)
3. Kristen shows up in California.
" Kristen left Robert in London!
What kind of relationship is that???
PR PR PR PR PR!!!
Wait. Kristen left London to hang out with
her friends at Coachella?
Rob and Kristen BROKE UP!"
(Here comes the snarling and howling)
So which is it, Mutts?
Kristen has NO friends and must chase after Rob...
Which makes her sad and pathetic
Kristen leaves Rob in London to hang out
with friends in California
which in turn makes her sad and pathetic.
I guess you have to be a rabid hyena for any of that
to make sense at all.
So if you want to think like a Hyena...
You need to get yourself some Rabies...
Early-stage symptoms of rabies are malise, headache and fever,
that is characterized typically by increased salivation,
progressing to acute pain, violent movements, uncontrolled excitement,
depression, aggressiveness, and dementia.
Not a pretty picture...
I think I'll pass.
And now to cleanse my mind
of all the NONsense...
W A L K I N G
Thank you, Robert...
Thank you so much.
It's really going to be a great summer
Can't you feel it in the air?
Robert and Kristen will be together
(what IS that around Kristen's neck, anyway??)
And even though it's not nice
to point and laugh at those
who are obviously deluded and pathetic...
I'm all for the upcoming whimpering excuses.
Just remember to bring a towel
and some hand sanitizer
I'm guessing you might get some spittle sprayed on you
from all the barking and snarling.
"It's gonna be a cruel... cruel summer..."
I guess for some it will be the DOG days of summer.
Bye for now.