"You can only see things clearly with your heart
What is essential is invisible to the eye"


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Friday, September 25, 2009

Robsten Rorschach Test

There is always so much drama surrounding pictures

of Rob and Kristen...

People actually get all emotional and strange

If you don't see things their way.

It's all a matter of perception, isn't it?

I look at a cloud... I see Rob.

You look at a cloud... You see Rob.

Wait. That's not what I mean.

People see what they want to see.

What they want to believe they see.

It doesn't necessarily make anyone right...

Or wrong.

But the degree you are willing to be right...

or to prove someone wrong...

Well... That's when it gets scary.

So I decided to do a

Robsten Rorschach Test.

You know...

Its a psychiatric test

A doctor shows you an inkblot...

You tell him what you see.


I'm gonna show 3 people

A Robsten picture...

They will tell us what they see.

RR is Raving Robsten

NN is Nasty Nonsten

and then we have

AN who is Abbey Normal.

And here we go...

RR: OMG! Rob and Kristen are SO in love!!

He has his arm around her.

He is looking at her with such love!

They are SO SO SO together!


KSpew is so ugly.

What is up with her gross hair?

Rob looks like he thinks she smells.

He seems to be saying 'Why are you touching me?'

I always stand with guys like that.

It doesn't mean ANYTHING.

AN: Nice picture.

Rob and Kristen look pretty comfy together.

Why is that other guy there?

He looks like he really wants to belong...

like he is trying really hard to be noticed.

RR: OMG! Rob and Kristen are SO SO SO in love!

Look how close they are!

They are SO into each other!

It looks like they are going to kiss!!

NN: Ewwwwww!

KSpew is so sweaty and ugly.


Rob looks like he doesn't want to touch her

He looks like he is yelling at her

to get away from him because she smells!

I sit at concerts like this all the time.

It doesn't mean ANYTHING!

AN: Wow.

That's a pretty intimate picture.

They look like they are very happy

being so close together.

It looks like they are enjoying themselves.

RR: OMG! Kristen has her legs wrapped around Robs!

They are SO SO SO in love!

NN: KSpew is ugly. I hate her.

She is the root of all evil.

It looks like she has trapped poor Rob.

Look at his face! He wants to get away from her!

I sit in limos with my legs wrapped around


Doesn't mean ANYTHING.

AN: Hmmm.

Another intimate picture.

A lot of space in a limo.

Yet, they are sitting there with

their legs wrapped around each other.

RR: Awww... Look at the way Kristen is staring lovingly at Rob.

They are SO SO SO in love!

NN: KSpew looks stoned.

Rob probably is too to let her get so close.

They are at a concert.

They have to get close to hear each other talk.

I talk to people like this all the time.

It doesn't mean ANYTHING.

AN: Kristen looks like she really likes Rob here.

Another intimate photo.

They seem to have fun with each other.

a lot.

(pic from Twilight-Gossip.com)

RR: OMG!!! Rob is SO SO SO in love with Kristen!

Look at the way he is smiling at her!

NN: Big deal.

Rob isn't even reacting to KSpew.

He's laughing at something Billy Burke said.

Rob only puts up with Kristen because they work together.

I laugh with co-workers like that all the time.

It doesn't mean ANYTHING.

AN: There seem to be a lot of pictures like this.

Rob and Kristen...

Looking at each other...

and smiling.


That concludes my Robsten Rorschach Test for today.

I will bring it back again...

For further analysis.

What do YOU see?

*any similarities between Abbey Normal and myself

is strictly coincidence and any similarities between

Raving Robsten or Nasty Nonsten to anyone

living or dead...

Well... that's just sad, isn't it?


Bye for now


Laura said...

Rose!! Fucking FANTASTIC post! Hilarious! And so fucking true! I like to think of myself as an AN as well! :))

Djam said...

Thanks for the post..love it..Hehehe..I can;t help myself from smiling...Just wishing though that they will be sooo in love in REAL..

loveactually said...

LOL! This was a great post! There is not one untrue word here. This is exactly what the fandom has become.
Thanks for the Friday amusement.:D

Lula! said...

You're pretty genius...just so you know...

p.s. I'm not a shipper of any kind, but when those pics surfaced yesterday, I said to one of my BFFs, "Um...yeah...they're in love."
The. End.

Trixie said...


This post was pure genius!

<3 you BFT!!!

imloco2 said...

OMG!!! You are So So So brilliant! LOL The really sad thing is I see the Raving Robsten’s and the Nasty Nontens everywhere... we really need more Abbey Normals. ;)

Anonymous said...

I fucking luuuuuuurve it!! Wonderful post! Keep it up!! Robsten all the way!

Anonymous said...

luv this!!! the funniest are NN arguments... they are so stupid lol
NN, you need to accept that they ARE dating

Anonymous said...

Love your analysis. Okay, I admit I'm on of the Raving Robstens ( raises hand proudly). And yes, so sad:)

imloco2 said...

I was just re-reading this and had to add... ROTFL!!! You are WIN!

auntapey said...

Love this post. One of my all time favs, Rose!

"I..... all the time. It doesn't mean anything."

Truly the NNs battle cry.

I will admit that sometimes I may dip into RR land, but I try to keep it to myself for the most part. Except for the squeeing I did the other day when I heard about the Harper's Bazaar photo shoot. Couldn't be helped in that situation. LOL

Again, great great post. :)